Waves of Grief

The last few days have been full of stuff to do. Mostly applications for private school for P next fall. Another hard reality to face - I can no longer be a homeschooling mom.

But today I visited G's grave and wept. I still can't believe he's gone. I miss him. I want him back. My chest aches with grief. There's a huge whole in my life and heart now.

A counselor told me that it's like learning to live without a limb. You adjust, but you're never the same.

Looking at pictures tonight - gosh do I miss him. What a sweet man he was. How he loved me so much. No one loves others life he did. Fiercely, devotedly, tenderly.

Yesterday it was hard to cry. Today it is hard to stop.

Waves of grief. I might look okay. I'm getting stuff done. But I am hurting so much inside.