I woke up feeling okay. After wrapping my mind around what day it was (the usual wake up and figure out what's on my plate for the day)...

I came to this space today to process in private. The other blog is out there - people are reading it in real time. But this one? No one...

It's my third Mother's Day without G and I feel okay. Maybe I won't later, but I needed to record that the approach of this holiday...

Imagine standing on a concrete floor holding a big, clear mirror in your hands. And then dropping it and watching it smash onto the...

It's the second day of fall, and the first day that it feels like it. I'm sitting here wearing a fleece jacket, jeans, and my favorite...

I feel like God is leading me in a new direction. I've been trying to hold on to the life that I had with G. As if holding on to that...

It still hurts. Rejection, feeling messed with, feeling cast aside. But I think I dodged a bullet. I met HW and it felt good to feel a...

Yesterday P went to his second day-long grief camp, nearly a year after his first. I've tried to look back in my memory of what it was...

A friend recently asked me why I still believe in God after everything I've been through. It was a genuine question, asked from a place...

I'm starting to share our story. Beyond this blog (which at this point has no readers!). I've had a secret Facebook account for a while...

I realized today that I can't find my future while I'm running away from my past. Life has changed so much since G died - this is true. ...

I've been feeling that old feeling again. That pit in my stomach. The nausea I associate with losing G. The constant, unending feeling...

My goodness, how is my boy finishing 2nd grade tomorrow? A grade that G wasn't here for at all. He's up to my shoulders now and growing...

I'm sitting at Panera this morning and there's a couple outside the window. Neither are wearing wedding rings. Both are probably in...

I need a new dream. I've been waiting for someone to give one to me, and I've felt aimless. Maybe remarriage has become my new dream. ...

I had an incredible husband. A really, really good one. He was not perfect. Of course not. His sin nature, his humanity, was all to...

It hurts to be ignored. It just does. Back in the winter, when I had trouble in my house and sent HW a text, he responded right away and...

God gives us protection and provision. No - God IS our protection and provision. As I've been chasing down this relationship with HW...

It is amazing how much can be revealed in a day. A day of letting it soak in that whatever relationship I thought I had with HW and...

This hurts. I woke up and it still hurts. But it does feels a little different - or maybe I'm just getting some clarity. I tried way too...