I feel angry. Furiously angry. Like it's welling up in my gut and has no place to go. There words feel too tame. I feel sick with...

There is a temptation in grief to romanticize the past. To divide your life into the categories of good (when your person was still...

Today would be 15 years of marriage. 15 years since we said I do. I've had this song in my head by Andrew Peterson since I woke up this...

I'm starting to share our story. Beyond this blog (which at this point has no readers!). I've had a secret Facebook account for a while...

I realized today that I can't find my future while I'm running away from my past. Life has changed so much since G died - this is true. ...

It's time to tell our story. When we began our heart transplant journey in January of 2010, we felt so alone. Being listed for a heart...

I've spent 2.5 hours today crying and processing all that God is doing in my heart. My counselor says this is a landmark day. Like the...

Why is a big question. And it's one I don't like to ask. Because there aren't any answers on this side of Heaven. Why did G die? Why...

I'm sitting at Panera this morning and there's a couple outside the window. Neither are wearing wedding rings. Both are probably in...

It's Mother's Day again. My second without G here. I truly can't remember last year. What did we do? Did we celebrate? I feel sure...

I took my wedding band off of my right hand last night. And now I'm down to one ring. Later this week, I travel with my son to a country...

We went to St. Thomas in January of 2020. I was so worried. So many things could go wrong. What if G got Zika? What if he had a health...

Yesterday I was talking to a friend about fear. Fears that I have for the future - for any changes that I might make. I look back and I...

2.0 People talk about finding your 2.0. Whether they mean your new life or a new person to share your life with, it's a common phrase in...

Yesterday I went to a co-worker's wedding. My first wedding since G died. First wedding without him by my side since my brother got...

A picture brought back a flood of memories. Christmas morning 2018. P opening a gift. G sitting up beside him - but slumped over...

I realized today that I still have to live one day at a time. That God's will unfolds one day at a time. His leading happens one day at...

I got a hair cut this week. A professional hair cut. At a salon. That cost over $100. And then I even bought the two products that...

My crazy heart has been all over the place this week. Absolutely shredded emotionally from grieving G's death and all that led up to it....

My counselor told me about a saying her daughter uses: "Follow the breadcrumbs". The breadcrumbs that are the slow unveiling of your life...